My Tinder Date with a Homeless Person

  It started off as every tinder horror story does – with a match.  He was, admittedly, gorgeous and I was thrilled to see that he had messaged me.  A single rose emoji, how sweet.  We started messaging sporadically and I had already gone on a somewhat successful tinder date earlier in the week so I agreed to take on another.  He mentioned he had hung out with friends he met at the hostile, “cool he’s been to Europe!” I thought and he was hesitant to explain but finally he admitted to being homeless for the past month or so.  Shit.  At this point, being a humanitarian and feeling bad that I had pushed for this disclosure I figured, YOLO and we agreed that he’d come over the next night and if things went well he could crash on my couch.

Things kind of went well at first, there was banter right off the bat and I figured maybe he’s not a secret murderer and really just in a tough spot.  But he was also nothing. like. the. pictures.  I had been catfished folks, by some excellent photoshopping and angles.  He looked like my aunt’s ex-husband, which is nothing spectacular let alone remotely gorgeous.  Then the conversation slowly started slipping into a topic I don’t care to talk about, high school.  And not just high school in general, his high school.  He named his entire football team (first and last names, grouping the players by position) and what they are currently doing.  And it didn’t stop there.  Everything mentioned he could somehow connect to an experience that was at least a decade old.  Cool story, bro.

Then there were the unwanted advances.  And maybe if I had been “feeling it” I would’ve been all for it but I wasn’t.  I forced and faked it thinking maybe if I did it long enough I’d feel some sparks but I didn’t feel anything but regret.  Why did I put myself in this situation?  Why am I too much of a pussy to tell him that I’m uncomfortable AF and I’d like you to leave?  But I was a good hostess and let him stay the night on the couch, sleeping with one eye open of course.

Well sometime in the middle of the night I am awoken to him straddling me and giving me a massage.  I cut that shit out real fast and being half asleep and not up for a fight just said you can sleep next to me but do not touch me.  He tried but I brushed him off every time.  When now, I know I should have kicked him out right then and there.  He walked me to work the next day and we said our goodbyes.  I knew full well a carefully crafted “pass” text needed to be sent just to end any subsequent communication and three unanswered texts from me later he received the rejection text.  There was a rebuttal but I was firm and he took it pretty well.

And that’s what ended tinder for me.  I lasted a week and 2 days.  Went on 2 dates.  It wasn’t about that particular date but how, as uncomfortable as I was, I didn’t stick up for myself and put the kybosh on it in fear of the confrontation it might lead to.  Plus, there’s a guy IRL that I like anyway.

Have any crazy tinder stories?? I would love to hear them!

Makeup Free Wk

Thursday morning 7:15am, sleeping in seems like a very tempting idea but there’s only 1 way to pull it off and make it into the office on time: forgo makeup.  Now, considering I’d penned a post just days ago about how horrid the girl world is and using no makeup as an example I was skeptical but I’m breakout free and knew I’d be well rested (hooray going to be on time!) so I hit snooze until 7:35am.


Day 1: Once I crawled out of bed I ate breakfast, watched the news and left the house.  It was surreal.  I felt like a boy.  But it was kind of liberating.  Kind of like a fuck you to societies standards and my own standards and I had totally forgotten I was wearing no makeup (just moisturizer, not even tinted) until I looked in the mirror and I didn’t even cringe or inspect, I just finished washing my hands and left the restroom.  I asked a male coworker on the el home if I looked dead and if he had noticed my bare face and he had no idea in fact, insisted I was wearing makeup.  Sealed the deal for me and decided, this is going at least a week, if not the entire rest of the summer.

Day 2: Friday.  Normally I do a cat eye or something dramatic because Friday.  But today, I woke up, tended to my drying laundry, showered and headed out the door.  But not before taking this selfie: image

Because, come on, makeup free isn’t so bad, I just wish Sutro was life filter.

So I went to work and again, no comments, except my friend/receptionist telling me I don’t look bad (LOL because I confided how nerve wracking this was to me.)  And I came to a realization, without makeup you’re not ugly, you’re just different.  So mirror checks slimmed down to a quick glance and then came the evening.  I knew coming into this week I had a birthday party at Headquarters (a beer-cade for all you non-Chicago folk) and would be faced with the choice: cheat and wear make-up, hello prospects could be there ?! OR stick to it and get ready like a man.  I actually chose the latter.  I washed my face with my menthol Burt’s Bees and left it on for 10 min as a mini-mask to give me a little glow and wore mascara just to vamp up my eyes a little but that’s it and I felt hot.  There’s something that’s kind of sexy about a bare faced woman for nighttime, the mystery of where she came or why she chose not to get ready.

image image image

Days 3 & 4 were the weekend so I rarely wear make-up anyway unless I’m going out.  I had to work Saturday morning and my sister came up to sleepover and have a pre-Pride celebration.  It was the Pride Parade in Chicago on Sunday, of course I went, and was going to do my make-up to be festive but there just wasn’t time.  Plus it was hot and I didn’t want it to melt on me so I glittered my body instead and opted for a rockin’ outfit.

image image

Day 5 – Monday.  Nothing changed except the dark spots that my pimples left behind are significantly fading, which is a huuuge plus for me, they’re impossible to cover with my makeup – they never quite disappear.  I’m still loving the low-maintenance aspect of the bare face but I did wear a little mascara today just to add some definition to my eyes and will probably just opt for that moving forward.

image image

Day 6: I woke up w a little bit of a breakout (two pimples on either side of my chin, thanks hormones) so I opted for a little tinted moisturizer since it was like 55 degrees so I knew it wouldn’t melt off my face. Still felt hot AF and cruised around my apartment most of the evening with my silver shades I got at Pride, because why not?

image image

Day 7: Wednesday.  Last day of the “challenge” but considering now it’s Friday and I still haven’t worn a touch of makeup, I can say I’ve officially converted.  There’s nothing wrong with a natural face.  I’m not rushing to throw out my collection but there really has to be an “occasion” for me to get all dolled up and that kind of makes me excited about it again.  The prospect of having to take a billion years to get ready and really WOW people now that everyone’s adjusted to my lowmaintenence look.  This week has brought me so much confidence in ways I never thought possible – I even posted a video of my dancing around in a teeny workout outfit. alone. in my apartment to Insta. Which, I’ve always wanted to but now I have and I don’t even regret it!  (plus, it’s pretty adorable – judge me people)


Ideas of what you could do w the time you save from not wearing makeup:

  • Make breakfast
  • Make an iced coffee or smoothie
  • Stretch/exercise
  • Wash your hair
  • Write in a dream journal
  • Do chores leftover from the night before
  • Leave 15 min early and actually be on time for work
  • Pen an email to an old friend
  • Watch the news
  • Plan your day
  • Do a face mask to make sure your bare face is ~ultra radiant~
  • Run an errand
  • Shave your legs
  • Pack a lunch
  • Or my personal favorite: Sleep in – cause that’s the whole point of this

07-19-2015 Update:


still going strong! Worn makeup a few times going out but am still loving the makeup free.  I’ve also noticed my skin is more poreless and the makeup looks so smooth going on!


And no, this isn’t going to be some brag post on “how I look like this” because that’s nothing to aspire to.  This is about feeling flawless and why the fuck we can’t accept when someone else does.

Imagine this… you wake up in the morning, late perhaps, and don’t put on makeup (and maybe you don’t wear makeup and I truly envy you if you are that type) because when I don’t wear makeup, purposefully or accidentally, 1 thing happens: all the girls in the office ask if I’m feeling ok, sick, hungover, or otherwise.  I can’t just not wear makeup, I have to be physically incapable of not wearing it in order not to.  The men?  They don’t give a shit.  A mean, maybe they think things but would never ask me if something’s going on but I honestly don’t think they notice either way.  Which boils down to all our other aesthetics, sure we do it for ourselves but we do it for each other because we certainly don’t do it for men as stated above because we know by now they don’t notice.  It’s the competition, the compliments, the confidence.  When, if we just all – every one of us so there’s no leg up in our make believe competition – chucked all our makeup tomorrow and stop shaving the world wouldn’t end.  Men may be like, “what the hell?”  But I think they’d get over it pretty quickly and come next generation, fuck, they’d be all about it.

So why do we do it to each other?  Why are we each other worst enemies when we need to help each other and not just by complimenting each other.  We aren’t in competition.  Some girls are pretty, some are funny, some are smart, artistic, slutty, are totally boho (I’m looking at you Miley) but who the fuck cares?  Let them live their lives as you would like to yours.  This isn’t even about the men and what privileges they have, it’s about us girls.  We already have it hard enough as it is, why can’t we just support each other?  Not superficially but fundamentally.  My relationships with my guy friends are a million times stronger than my female friends (when I have them, which I usually don’t) and it’s because they don’t care.  No judgement, just there to hang but women, if we’re not listening we’re usually shit talking.  It’s just so lame.  How are we so mentally and emotionally intelligent and yet so petty?

So let’s take a pledge to just be a little less judge-y moving forward.  Let there not be jealousy over boyfriends, girlfriends, looks, instagrams, status, clothes, bags, bodies or promotions.  Let her do her thang and rock her own world.  Don’t get me wrong I still care [what all you ladies think] but not as much as I used to and stop myself whenever I start getting wicked thoughts.  It’s hard (ahem, impossible) to be #zerofucks all the time and I’m a “highly sensitive person” so it’s even more challenging but I’m getting there.  It’s about surrounding yourself with good people and with any luck soon they will be super easy to find.

Bottom line: just be kind to one another.  Nothing bad comes out of kindness.

Thai Inspired Dinner

Full disclosure: I love curry. Thai, Indian, anything, I can always get down on the complex flavors of a curry. My parents and sister do not share the same views thus leaving me overcome with joy today realizing I could make a curry rice with no objections.

Curry is one of those foods though that I enjoy eating but don’t have a lot of experience making so I wanted to start simple, on the menu tonight:

Rice cooker coconut rice

Marinaded chicken drumsticks

Grocery List:
Coconut milk – 1 cup
Soy sauce
Shredded coconut
Jasmine rice
1 Lime
1 red bell pepper
1 onion
1 clove garlic
1 fresh ginger root
1 jalapeño
Green onion (for garnish)
Meat or meat substitute to marinade (I used chicken drumsticks)
thai chicken

Rice Cooker Coconut Rice:

  • 2 cups water
  • 1 cup coconut milk
  • 2 tsp shredded coconut (sweetened or not, I used sweetened and it was lovely)
  • 2 cups jasmine rice
  • ½ of a diced red pepper – snack on the rest :)
  • 1 green onion chopped

Combine all ingredients in the rice cooker, give it a quick stir and turn on.


  • ¼ cup honey
  • ¼ c chopped onion
  • 2 tbsp lime juice
  • 2 tbsp soy sauce
  • 2 cloves garlic
  • 1 jalapeño
  • 2 tsp minced ginger

Combine and let meat (swordfish, chicken, pork, portabello’s, tofu, whatever you fancy) marinade for 1+ hours (1 hour for swordfish) – I let it go for 2 but it could have gone overnight for the chicken

Cooking the chicken drumsticks:

*I used 5 – for dinner and leftovers (I buy the bulk packs of like 13 and break them down, it averages to about $1.49 per lb)

  • Marinaded drumsticks
  • High-rimmed baking pan
  • Extra Honey
  • Green onion for topping

Preheat oven to 375 degrees

Place drumsticks in the pan and pour remaining marinade over top – scrape off any veggies that are atop the chicken (they burn while cooking) and put an extra drizzle of honey overtop.

Cook for 1 hour and top with green onion for flavor and presentation

Commuting: On the Chic


I go to the internet for everything – recipes, music, tutorials, reviews and it’s a sad day when something I search yields no relative results… What was that search you ask?  Chic commuting.

It’s out there, I know it is.  I see woman triumphantly walking to work with their oversized totes going into a day of unknown while still being prepared for virtually anything that may come their way (so maybe it’s out there and no one blogs about it?).

Ok, sooooo there were some results but it was for bike riding commuters… I don’t/am not planning on commuting in such a way #alreadygoinggreenonpublictrans so here’s my attempt at explaining the must haves for a seamless transition from home, to train, to office, to anywhere.

selfiegenblog       It pains me to think of retiring my ultra chic Botkier bag (it’s literally a working woman’s dream, mixed texture leather in a rich burgundy, perfect profile from every angle) but it’s small… Can’t even hold a pair of heels comfortably therefore, not a commute fit.  So my first to do: buy a massive tote and an oversized clutch to stash inside –  (clutch I decided on shown- decent size and it has “selfie” on it, couldn’t resist) – Remember: this will be the new representation of you so think quality not quantity.

Which brings us directly to, commuter purse essentials:

Shoes – or keep them at work.  I keep 2 pairs of flats and a pair of black heels (boots in the winter and sandals in the summer).

Charger & headphones


Water bottle




Makeup – or consider picking up sample sizes of your favs and keeping the set at the office so you don’t have to worry about trying to make room in your clutch when you go out

  • concealer and brush
  • powder and brush
  • MAC’s fix +
  • eye liner and brush
  • palette with an array of shades from highlight to dramatic
  • lipstick of your choice – non-negotiable
  • rich lip balm
  • mascara
  • make-up wipes

Wallet – ID, Debit cards, $20 cash, check book

Ponytails, bobby pins

Floss – saved me too many times.  It’s a must

Nail file

Workout clothes

Have a place to stash your survival kit over the weekend without risking it not being there on Monday morning.  Filing cabinet? Top drawer? Think minimalist with maximum potential. Keep the following things at the office to transition from day to night:

Sassy jacket – no other word to describe it but sassy… think: lace, embellishments, leather, furry, sequins, satin… Not just a normal suit jacket, something you can downplay at the office and vamp-up (by removing a garment?) in the evening

Plain tank – something versatile you can dress up or down 

Ban wipes or baby wipes or whatever the hell kind of wipes.  I don’t know about you but after a day of office building air and enclosed spaces I feel pretty gross…  You can find the ban wipes at Walmart for like $1 for 10

Dry shampoo and hairspray



Curling iron/straightener – you know the one that’s kinda shitty but just can’t throw away.  I mean it’s still works…

Spare panties

Your perfume, preferably in roll-on form as to not assault the next person to use the restroom.  Also, allergies, just cool it on the spray.


Clear nail polish

Krazy glue

Sewing kit

Snacks & tea – high protein snacks (nuts, granola bars, trail mix)

Toothpaste and toothbrush

Contact/eye solution – if applicable – and maybe a spare pair of contacts…

† Survivalist tip: alcohol pads (rubbing alcohol) or lemon can act as neutralizer for underarms, do this in a pinch as opposed to washing them.

Last thing… When people invite you to go out after work… YOU BETTA GO!  (And maybe we all don’t have the, “no” reflux I’ve developed)  But, don’t hesitate, don’t overthink it, just go. Otherwise, you’ll regret it and suffer mad FOMO.

True story: a guy I was kinda feeling (internet intro so we’d never met before) texted me last minute for drinks.  I was wearing glasses that day so I declined – that and, of course, needed to seem too busy for last minute drinks. Amiright? (future Coral says, “NO, you are wrong” anyway,) so I tell him some lame errands excuse and agree to resched.  Needless to say, it’s been 2 weeks and he hasn’t rescheduled.  And sure, we can go into the whole, well clearly it wasn’t meant to be bullshit and whatever other lies we tell ourselves to feel better but let’s be big girls and realize I was a bitch to say no, glasses or no glasses, last minute or week in advance, just say yes.

Happy Commuting Y’all!

Have some tips of your own?  Share below!

And Now, A Post Dedicated to One of My Fav. Dupes – Hamcon!


So first off, what the hell is hamcon?

It’s my mom’s less messy, low fat, po’ man’s answer to bacon.  Now, I’m sure there are going to be focus groups on revolt of the whole notion that you could actually not eat bacon and pretend like it’s as good as bacon but I am here to tell you, you sure can!

Meeting adjourned.

We use the Hillshire Farms brand ultra thin deli meat (it’s gluten-free) and we seriously use it as a bacon substitution in every recipe.  Wrapped jalapeno poppers? Tried it, delicious.  Eggs benedicts? Of course.  With eggs and toast?  You know it.  You also probably get the picture…

Here’s our base recipe:

Cover a tray with a thin layer of ham – try not to overlap

Cook at 350° until it smells delicious and looks crispy.

But it’s virtually greaseless and it is 100x less messy than bacon.  I have no idea what the caloric and fat difference is between the two but again, I can imagine it’s substantial.  So just try it.  Maybe you won’t make the switch full time but it’s a good substitution to have in your back pocket.

Willing to try it?  What did you think?

Fabulous, Fashionable Food – Paillard De Poulet (Chicken Salad) Recipe

20140316-192147.jpgI’m not even going to remotely take credit for this recipe, except that I spotted it in an old issue of Marie Claire magazine and shared it with my mom. We agreed it sounded orgasmic (plus, if a fashion mag is wasting their print space on a recipe, you know it has to be good.) and it has proved to be one in our constant rotation.  A bit labor intensive but definitely worth it.  Also, very impressive for serving to guests.

Paillard De Poulet

Makes 4 Servings


** Just get whatever quality brands you find at your local grocery store.

  • 4 8 oz trimmed organic chicken breasts
  • 4 basil leaves
  • 4 thyme sprigs
  • 4 garlic cloves
  • ½ cup plus 4 tbsp EVOO
  • 4 lrg heirloom tomatoes
  • ½ cup marinated olives (Niçoise and Castelvetrano)
  • 2 tbsp sherry vinegar
  • 1 loaf [gluten free/olive] bread
  • 1 cup whole cow’s-milk ricotta (Bellwether Farms Jersey cow ricotta)
  • 1 cup loosely packed arugula
  • Kosher salt
  • Freshly cracked ground pepper
For the chicken:

For the marinade place the basil, thyme and garlic in a mortar and pestle.  Add ½ cup olive oil mixture until the fragrance of the herbs and garlic comes out.  Place the chicken in a bowl and cover with the marinade.  This can be done up to 1 day in advance.  (**Coral note: it’s advised to do it the day in advance.  Breaks down the chicken beautifully and you might as well infuse as much flavor as possible since they’re boneless.)

When ready to serve, grill chicken and let rest.  It should be room temperature for the salad.

For the salad:

Cut the tomatoes into large chunks (too small and they lose their intense flavor.)  Place in a large mixing bowl.  Add the olives and season with the remaining olive oil, sherry vinegar, salt and pepper.  This can be left to marinate for an hour. (Coral note: again, longer the better because it breaks it all down.)

Tear the [gluten-free] bread into big chunks.  In a large sauté pan, fry the bread in olive oil until golden and crispy.  Drain on a kitchen towel.  –OR— We make them by pureeing the left over olive marinate and spreading it over the gf bread chunks and baking them.  350° for about 10 minutes should just about do it.


20140316-192919.jpgDivide the tomatoes and the olives among four plates.  (In the photos shown we added asparagus to the mixture)20140316-192932.jpgScoop an ample serving of ricotta (Coral note: about 2 heaping spoonfuls) onto each plate20140316-193004.jpgLoosely place the arugula on top – not too much, this salad isn’t about the lettuce.20140316-211759.jpgAdd croutons and place the chicken atop the other layers20140316-211810.jpgDrizzle the remaining juice from tomatoes atop

Tip! It’s best if you can build the salad and then let it rest for a while at room temperature, can be up to 4 hours.  It just allows the ricotta to break down and become really creamy.

Bon Appetit!

Farewell 2014, Hello 2015

My mom and I pre-NYE festivities

 Disclaimer: this is going to be a bit of a “brag blog,” if you will, but we’re all entitled to these every once in a while – or every post – whichever is more your style. #noshame

Now cue my cliche intro…

As 2015 begins, I’d like to take the time to reflect on my accomplishments throughout 2014.  I think we all kind of feel helpless and at a plateau at times so it’s important to see that, in fact, you have actually been improving all the while. There was this one metaphor one of my yoga instructors shared during class about bamboo. The anecdote goes that bamboo, even if grown in perfect conditions, grow only 2″ the first year, and again the second, and the third. But the fourth year it grows 80 feet.  

So, like the bamboo, we all are slowly improving.  Maybe we can’t see it, or feel it (which we lose sight of in our instant gratification way of life) but eventually you’ll be able to look back and see your 80 feet of change and growth.

Back to the point, the bragging part.  

2014 Accomplishments:

I jumped in 2 feet first and started over. Finally left a job that was absolutely not working for me (even if that means moving back into my parents for the first time since being 18.  You gotta do what you gotta do)

Got a job that I absolutely love, right where I want to be.  And a raise! 

Quit smoking. Almost 2 months smoke free! (For all you smokers: JUST DO IT ALREADY! The only thing I regret is not doing it sooner)

Started working out – as mentioned here 

And taking better care of my body – drinking the 64+ oz per day, easing off caffeine intake, upping my fruits and veggies intake, saying no to junk food and sweets. Eating better leads to feeling better and limiting the cravings

Started embracing my creative outlet again.

I’ve gotten comfortable being uncomfortable and pushing myself way out of my comfort zone, aka growing up. #22goingon30

My boobs somehow jumped from an A to a D so my body’s a-changing and it’s more important to remember that and to not compare myself with my 18 year old boy body.

Cut off my bullshit spending – no Starbucks or Jimmy John’s for Coral. It was super hard the first week or 2 but when I looked at my bank account, it was worth it.

Started embracing the all-natural beauty products.  Toothpaste, face wash, moisturizer, ect.  I’m planning a post detailing my favorites and why I made the switch.

Went on my first solo vacation.  Which I paid for myself.  Nothing makes you feel like more of an adult as when you can afford to send yourself to Cancun for your co-workers wedding.

As for 2015… There’s nowhere to go but up. NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS:

Start saving for planned and unplanned ventures.

Be more dedicated to my blog and projects. 

Stop with the #nonewfriends mentality, it has got me nowhere. Time for friends! Carpe diem!

Get on that 6 pack.  That means no more chips. Or office treats.

Take less selfies and more group photos.

Wear that lipstick! Try that funky hair trend. It’s just about being comfortable being yourself around strangers.

Be more organized!  Tidy up for 15 min a day

Cut out caffeine and coffee entirely

Embrace your practice and be more patient.

Just have the best year ever! and let it go.

Cheers to our 80 foot year!

What were your 2014 accomplishments? Brag below!

Private Headquarters 101: Living Alone vs. A Roommate


       I’ve done both and I definitely have a preference of my own place but I am also extremely independent. At 2 years old I could be found sneaking away from my family at the Ventura, California beach house we always rented for Christmas (it would be my entire extended family, a lot of attention for me, too much attention) in favor of cruising along the beach by myself. There was one person though that was always watching my every move, my dad #daddysgirl (above photo)

Moral of the story, I like my space. But just as with everything, to each our own, and there are pros and cons to both.

But first here are a few general guidelines for moving out:

  • Rent is to be 30% of your monthly salary or less. No exceptions. I don’t care how good of a budgeter you are, you will always resent living in a place you can’t afford. Remember: you’ll get there eventually.
  • At least have one months rent savings, just in case. Don’t touch it. After it’s set aside, it doesn’t exist unless you lose your job or something.
  • If you’re on a budget to get started, buy the necessities first and then the decor.  Believe me, your place will never be finished anyway.
  • If you have to sleep on the floor, don’t move out. I’ve done this too and there’s nothing more depressing than a place with no furniture. No matter how good the view
  • Don’t forget about cleaning supplies! They’re probably a good $100 minimum, even more if your place is carpeted
  • Plan it out. Moving on a whim makes it way more of a burden than it needs to be.
  • Expect to pay about $300 in actual moving costs (hiring movers, renting a truck, pizza and beer if your recruite friends, packing tape, ect)
  • Get boxes at your local grocery store – if you’re a regular, it’s even easier. Just be polite (of course) and ask customer service, usually it’s no biggie. You’ll get a variety of sizes, which is a plus.
  • Pack over a couple weeks – at least 1 week minimum. Though, doing it in 12 hours is possible. I’ve done it twice. Just sayin’
  • Do your due diligence on your potential new home. Walk around the neighborhood in the daytime and the night. Make sure it’s realistic proximity to necessities for your lifestyle, research the commute and every other aspect of your life.
  • Pay attention during your walk through. Don’t be so excited that you overlook significant problems ie: no vent in the bathroom or poor water pressure.  Make sure you have all of your deal breakers and discuss any obvious issues. – ask about painting as well if you plan on doing so.

Living Alone

  • Your cleanliness. If you’re a clean person your apartment will be a safe haven.  If you don’t clean up, you look like a slob but either way, it’s on you.
  • No labeling food or risk of someone (aside from guests) using your things.
  • Parties whenever YOU want – even though you may have limited space to throw them
  • Underwear or nakedness. Whenever you want, wherever you want. Just remember to close the drapes!
  • No worrying about having to share the bathroom, or closing the door
  • No fighting over the remote, yelling to turn anything down, preference issues whatsoever
  • Basically, no shame
  • Not having to deal with any one elses decor – which, if you’re like me, is a huge deal
  • No unwanted pets or pet hair (this actually has been an issue for me)
  • No entitlement/ego issues
  • No fighting over who gets the bigger room


  • Its expensive, No one to bail you out if you Nicki Minaj it up, “I ain’t paying rent this month, I owe that,” and blow your rent money on shoes (or bottle service.)  But you’re paying for all your own things so there’s no contribution issues.
  • It’s lonely at times
  • You’re never going to come home to a cooked meal – except if you have a crockpot, or an S.O. or maybe your crockpot is you S.O., no one’s judging you, you live alone. With that, buy a crockpot.
  • Drinking alone’s a little weird – but you get used to it.
  • It could be a little scary. There was a time when someone banged on my door (in a 24 hr doorman attended building) in the middle of the night. Never been more terrified – it was nothing, probably a drunk neighbor but still would’ve like to have been able to send an “OMG DID YOU HEAR THAT??” text


Depending on your personality and preferences it could be worth the sacrifices to live alone (like, maybe not being able to afford a place in the ritziest neighborhood) but, hey, it’s worth it if it’s what you really want. It develops character and independence and you’re doing everything by your own schedule.

If saving money is most important to you, then this probably isn’t the best option unless you’re willing to significantly downgrade from your allotted 30% to accommodate for additional savings.


  • There are 2+ heads figuring out a household problem ie: broken toilet, leaky sink
  • There are 2+ people to clean – or not clean, however you live.
  • There are 2+ people splitting the cost of everything. Internet for $17 per mo vs. $35, along with everything else
  • Best case scenario: you are super compatible and there are no major issues
  • 2+ people furnishing the place
  • Potentially a Friends rent controlled place forever
  • Friends in general. #dreamscenario


  • It’s not that easy to move out if you don’t get along
  • Your entire life is going to be lived in front of someone else
  • It’s a huge risk – they could be crazy, kleptos, lazy, messy, rude, loud, smelly, a whole lot of non-favorable traits.
  • 2+ people are having to agree on said apartment
  • Invitations you didn’t consent to but it’s “their place too”
  • Splitting up everything when you move – “did you buy this or did I?”
  • Someone eating/using your stuff likely without permission


You have to set a precedent for how you plan to live your life with your roommate(s). If you’re clean, be tidy from day 1. If you don’t want to share everything, say no in the beginning, as uncomfortable as it may be. Communicate with your roommate(s) and lay down expectations and guidelines before you even move in. Explain your “vision” for the place and listen to theirs to make sure harmony is actually achievable. Make a chore wheel if need be, just do whatever you can to prevent future conflict because your home is really your sanctuary. With that, know that you, too, will have to be flexible and compromise.